A Pink Halloween

Flynn was a vision in pink for her fourth Halloween.  She's not really a "girly girl" but she told me she wanted to be a pink princess this year.  (Of course her wish is my command!)

Flynn's school has a tradition of holding a "Character Parade" on Halloween.  The students march around the main campus dressed as a character from one of their favorite books.  The students are also required to carry the book as they march. I saw many skinny-armed Harry Potter's lugging around a heavy, thick book as they made three laps around campus. 

Flynn is into the "Pinkalicious" series of books so we were lucky her Pink Princess costume worked for this theme.  I volunteered to help get the kindergarten students dressed for the big parade.  It was a fun, noisy, and hectic experience helping these giddy students prepare for the march. The Executive Director of the school led the parade on bicycle dressed as Ramona Quimby (aka "Ramona the Pest.)  The kindergarten students followed and grades 1st-thru-8th marched along.  It was an impressive sight. 

I had to teach Halloween night so Flynn had an abbreviated "Trick-or-Treat" session with Grandpa.  (thanks dad!)  She had a good time talking to the neighbors and collecting candy.  Her favorite part of the evening was helping Grandma hand out the candy at the door.  She'd hear a knock and exclaim, "Oh good!  We have more CUSTOMERS!"  She was thrilled.  I'm proud she enjoys giving more than receiving.  She's a special girl. 

Pumpkins and Apples

We had a beautiful crisp fall day for our first field trip with Flynn's kindergarten class. Appropriately enough our destination was an apple orchard. 

I was a "class parent" for the trip and I was impressed with how the students behaved and cared for one another. The teachers did an amazing job of preparing the students and organizing the trip entirely in Chinese. By the end of the field trip even I was understanding things and speaking a little Chinese.

It's been a while since I last rode in a school bus for an extended period of time. Let's just say it was a memorable experience. I don't recall my tailbone hurting as much as the bus drove over bumps when I was a third grader! For some reason I forgot that these big yellow buses are lacking shock absorbers and any kind of suspension! Ouch!

The kindergarten staff sent a note to parents asking them to dress their children in snow pants, winter coats, hats, and mittens for the trip to the orchard. Now, as I mentioned it is a bit crisp this time of year--but you certainly don't have to dress for blizzard conditions. The situation made me smile and remember the "clothing police" in China. These "officers" were usually Chinese grannies who would scold you for not dressing your child in many layers of thick clothing in July! (I'm not kidding.) For some reason the Chinese culture seems to revere over-dressing. We traveled in a packed school bus with some very warm children. I forgot to mention all the bus windows were closed for the first 15-minutes of the trip. Eventually the school Vice Principal took pity on us and forced some windows to open a crack. I let the five little girls I was responsible for take off their wool hats on the bus! They were grateful. Sweaty but grateful.

When we reached our destination the students had fun running around on the playground, taking a hay ride, hunting for pumpkins and picking apples. Flynn had a great time and I was pleased to see her happily interacting with her school mates. 

We capped off the day with apple donuts and Flynn got her first taste of real apple cider. She pronounced it "delicious" and asked if we could make our own from the apples she picked. I told her we lacked an apple press and would buy some at the store. Flynn was a bit disappointed but agreed it "might be easier to buy some at Target." 

The Language of Love

It’s amazing to watch Flynn speak, read and write Chinese.  She continues to enjoy her immersion kindergarten program and I’m grateful she’s attending such a good school. 

About a week ago Flynn made a surprising remark as we drove home from school.  She said, “I’m kind of afraid to learn more Chinese.  What if I begin to forget English?  Then I won’t be able to talk to you.” 

I told her she didn’t need to worry about forgetting English. I reminded her that we all speak English in our house and most of her friends speak English so she won’t have the opportunity to forget it. 

Flynn thought about that for a while and then said, “Yeah, but I used to speak something else and now I forgot it. Maybe I can forget English too.” 

Her comments took me off guard and I was once again reminded of Flynn’s fabulous memory.  For the first two years of her life Flynn spoke Cantonese.  When we first met she didn’t know a word of English and I could barely manage to proclaim, “I’m an American!” in Mandarin.  (Wo shi Mei guo ren.)

During her first few months at home Flynn and I spent hours looking at English vocabulary flash cards, pointing out words and pictures in big Richard Scarry books, and trying to communicate with each other.  The experience helped to strengthen our bond as mother and daughter. 

Flynn’s life in Beihai, Guangxi China is a part of her.  One day I hope we can explore this history together.  

On a much lighter note, Flynn and I had fun recently at the Renaissance Festival.  We joined up with Flynn’s best friend from Pre-School, “M,” and the girls had fun looking at castles, talking to fairies and meeting members of the festival’s royal family.  They even had a private audience with the Queen and took an impromptu belly-dancing lesson.  

In whatever language we speak or what century we visit—once thing remains the same.  I adore my girl.  As I said to Flynn the moment I first saw her, “Wo ai ni.”  I love you! She's my Beihai Beauty.

Ni Hao Kindergarten

Flynn started kindergarten on August 30^th.  I’m thrilled and proud of my wonderful, excited kindergartener.  I’m sorry I could not post a more timely update.  I'm glad you found this blogspot blog and thank you for continuing to follow our journey.  

Flynn is attending a Chinese immersion school and I’m amazed at how quickly she’s picking up the language.  She can already count to 30 in Mandarin. (She may accidentally skip a number or two along the way!)  The drop offs the first week of school have been a little shaky.  Poor Flynn gets very anxious and tears up as she says, “I’ll miss you mommy!”  This past Friday we had our first non-crying drop off and I consider it a victory.  As challenging as the drop offs are—I’m rewarded with picture perfect pick-ups in the afternoon.  A happy, smiling Flynn runs down the hallway yelling, “I had so much fun in school today.  I’m glad to see you mommy!”  It melts my heart every time. 

After her first day of kindergarten Flynn asked if she could hold Baby Sam.  When Sam was born in March Flynn was anxious to hold her cousin.  We all told her once she was in kindergarten she could hold him.  (Figuring Flynn would be more mature and Sam would be less fragile.)  Nothing escapes her memory and Flynn held us to our promise.  She got to hold and feed Sam andI think it was a nice experience for both of them. 

Over Labor Day weekend Flynn and I made a brief visit to the State Fair with Grandpa.  We focused on repeating the Fair traditions we began during our visit last year.  We rode the Sky Ride, the Space Needle, and saw the butter sculptures.  Under the heading of “anything for my kid” I rode the Giant Slide with Flynn.  She was so happy.   I’m relieved I did not break my back or dislocate anything on the way down. Flynn ate her first SnoCone—cherry flavored—and we ended the adventure with a relaxing bus ride back to our park-and-ride.  It was a nice visit. 

As we wrapped up the summer Flynn had some dental surgery.  I’ll spare you the details—I’m relieved it is over and she’s doing well.  On the last official day of summer vacation Flynn and I went to the new Como Pool and had a blast.  It was a great ending to an eventful summer. 

I’m looking forward to successfully navigating this season of change. 

Interviewed by Puppets

This summer is zipping by and I’m trying to appreciate every moment—the good and the not so good. 

First, I’m lucky Flynn enjoyed her camp adventures.  She adored Art Camp and liked learning about the artistic cultures of the Caribbean and Japan.  She was very enthusiastic and I’m impressed with the quantity and quality of the art she produced.  Our favorite project from Japan week was making Candy Sushi.  The children combined fruit roll-ups, gummy worms, and Rice Krispy treats to make an edible item resembling a California Roll.  It was very creative.

Flynn reported Chinese Immersion camp was “hard but sort of fun.”  The Chinese camp was held in her new school.  She quickly learned how to count to 20 in Chinese and mastered some greetings and other vocabulary words.  It took her young, sponge-like brain just a few days to absorb what took me MONTHS to learn when I took some beginning Chinese classes before my trip to get Flynn.   We’re both excited about all she will learn once she officially starts kindergarten.  We received a packet from Flynn’s school on Saturday and are pleased to learn her actual kindergarten teacher was her main camp leader.  Hopefully this will make Flynn feel more comfortable as she starts her new educational experience.

 

I really enjoyed teaching my summer session class at the University of Minnesota.  I taught this class once before to a large group of about 120 students.  This summer I instructed 23 future mass communication professionals and appreciated the opportunity to really get to know my students.  I hope I don’t sound too boastful—but I’m pleased with my development as a teacher.  Last Fall I took a course called “Preparing Future Faculty.”  It gave me some new tools to make my lectures more relevant and, dare I say, exciting.  I had several lectures this past session when I felt things were really clicking.  I’m happy because I remember this feeling from my days anchoring newscasts and programs on the radio. It’s nice to have that feeling again.  This Fall I’m teaching a course entirely online.  It’ll be interesting to see how it differs from traditional, lecture-based teaching.  I’m grateful for the opportunity.

So that’s the good. Now for the not so good.  We’re dealing with some issues with Flynn’s cleft, speech, and teeth.  On July 19^th Flynn had a nasaloscopy to determine if work needs to be done to “tweak” her palate.  Flynn was a real trooper during the procedure. She was lightly sedated as they pushed a tiny camera and cord through her nasal passages and down into the roof of her mouth.  Flynn had to be awake so she could repeat sounds and sentences so we could see her palate in action.  I truly could not ask for a better girl when it comes to dealing with medical appointments. 

Once Flynn’s speech therapist, Kelly, told me what to look for I could see on the big TV screen in the room that Flynn has some “bubbling and leaking” in connection with her palate.  This is problematic because it is a hindrance to her producing good speech sounds.  Flynn has done a lot of hard work in her speech therapy sessions—but no matter how hard she works she can’t overcome the physical and anatomical issues. 

We met with Flynn’s surgical team on July 24^th.  I was totally ready for some bad news and prepared to talk about another surgery for Flynn.  Much to my surprise the team advised it would be best to wait before another round of surgery.  Dr. Wood said he wants Flynn’s head to grow some more and her adenoids, tonsils and palate tissues to “mature.”  We will reassess after the winter holidays. 

I’m grateful we have such a great team of doctors and are getting wonderful advice.  This situation is a life lesson for me.  I’m the type of person who likes to plan, take on challenges and move forward.  In many situations with Flynn I have to learn to let things happen as they come.  I’m certainly not in control of things and can’t manage all circumstances.  It’s a humbling and hard lesson. 

We also visited the dentist recently and he determined Flynn needs oral surgery to fix some deep cavities and to take a good look at the teeth growing in her cleft area.  We’re traveling to St. Cloud early this Wednesday morning for the surgery.  We have to be at the surgical center at 5:45am.  So that means a 3am wake-up call for grandpa and me as we take a sleepy Flynn on a long drive north.  This dentist is a specialist and if we tried to book and appointment in St. Paul we would have to wait until sometime close to Thanksgiving.  I want to get this taken care of before Flynn starts school.  The early wake-up call will give me a flashback to my days as a morning newscaster!  We appreciate all good thoughts as Flynn undergoes this procedure Wednesday morning.

Flynn was also a superstar as we participated in the last session for the “Transition to Home” study at the University of Minnesota International Adoption Clinic.  We began this in-depth research in September 2009.  It’s amazing to see how far we’ve both come since the study began.  This last session lasted more than three hours.  Flynn once again wore the semi-uncomfortable brainwave cap and spent a good hour playing games and being interviewed as the team scanned her brainwave patterns in the next room.  I participated in a lengthy phone interview with a researcher in Washington State.  Flynn played games to test her memory and had her saliva collected so they can examine her stress hormones. 

The final activity involved a pair of puppets talking to Flynn and interviewing her about her feelings.  The session was taped and I got to watch the entire event via closed circuit television in another room.  Some of the topics were very emotional for me to hear.  For example, the puppets asked Flynn about her dreams.  Flynn said she often has bad dreams.  The puppets asked her for more details.  Flynn explained that she often dreamt she was alone in a hospital and could not find her mother.  This is a real emotional button for both of us—since Flynn was indeed alone during her first surgeries in China.  She also talked about how happy she was to have a mother who cared about her and helped her.  It was emotional for me to hear her forthright answers and a challenge for me to keep my composure.

 

On a lighter note, I’ll share an amusing exchange between Flynn and the puppets.  Some of the questions are geared to gauge certain things—like attachment, emotional maturity, self-control, and structure in the household.  It is sort of a parental nightmare to hear your child talk about what goes on privately in your home.  For example, the puppets asked Flynn “Does your mom feed you healthy snacks or can you eat anything you want to eat.”  Flynn replied, “Well, I only like healthy snacks so that’s what I eat. (Hooray Flynn! In truth, she’s been known to eat Oreo Cookies, ice cream and Tootsie Rolls!) 

This is a classic Flynn exchange:

Puppets:  Flynn can you watch anything you want on TV or does your mother tell you what to watch?

Flynn:  I can watch anything I want on TV (long pause) as long as my mom says it’s okay.

You have to love a girl who won’t rat out her mother!  Flynn is the best.

Please Meet My Daughter!

It is my great pleasure to introduce you to my new daughter from China. I am beyond excited and I am so grateful.

Her Chinese name is Guo Danji and she was born on June 25, 2007. It is my understanding that many children living in her orphanage have the last name Guo. I have not settled on her American first name but know her middle name will be Danji.

She is currently living at the Social Welfare Institute of Beiliu City in Guangxi, China. Beiliu City has a population of 1.16 million people and is in the southwestern part of China on the South China Sea.

The doctors at the University of Minnesota International Adoption Clinic have proclaimed her to be “adorable” and a “darling little girl.” I totally agree. She has a cleft lip and palate and I feel lucky to live near two of the top hospitals in the country for dealing with this medical issue.

I have accepted this referral and I’m waiting for China to send the next round of documents and a travel date.

Here’s what the report from the Welfare Institute of Beiliu City says about my beautiful girl:

--She is fond of hugging by her nanny and listening to children’s songs.
--Her favorite toy is a ringing bell. (I’ve already purchased her a new bell!)
--She always pays attention to novel things. (A journalist in training?!)
--She is not afraid of strangers.
--She has a sweet smile and is a lovely girl.

Here’s the brief version of how this happened. I filled out the final paperwork to officially join the WIC program last Thursday. When I asked my social worker, Laura Nystrom, when I should be mentally prepared for a referral she replied, “tomorrow morning.” I was stunned. I doubted her and thought I would be carrying around my phone and checking my e-mail for months. As you may recall, I’ve gotten pretty good at waiting. Monday morning the CCAA sent Children’s Home a file of new waiting children. It included my precious daughter. I got THE CALL around 5pm Monday. I immediately sent the medical records to the U of M. They were wonderful and got back to me within 24 hours. Wednesday morning I told Children’s Home “She’s the one for me!”

How can someone who was waiting so long say—“It all happened so fast?!” But that’s how I feel. It’s a happy whirlwind. I’m falling in love.